Bedtime and winding down

Times are counted back from lights out, not from the clock. On a hard day the whole wind-down starts earlier and gets shorter, and the last forty minutes carry fewer instructions, not more.

When they are up at 2am

Be boring. Lights stay low, your voice stays flat, nothing new happens - no snack, no television, no conversation about why. Walk them back, one short sentence, leave. Then do it again, as many times as it takes. A dull return teaches the night nothing; an interesting one teaches it plenty.

When to get help

Loud snoring or pauses in breathing, waking in terror most nights, or more than an hour to fall asleep for weeks on end are all worth raising with a GP. Childhood sleep problems are common, treatable, and not something to wait out. Nothing on this page is a substitute for that.